This is Weston's memory chest. I found it at a thrift store: it is made of cedar and was painted red and green, so I painted over it and had stencils custom-made. My stencil job turned out really crappy, so I had to paint over it after I took this picture. The second stencil job is a train wreck as well. I am really frustrated and haven't touched the chest, except to look at Weston's things inside it, for over a month. There have been days where I feel like the ultimate failure of a mother, with my body unable to keep him inside me long enough. The least I could do is create a beautiful memory chest for him, and I can't even do that. Fortunately, I am not that hard on myself most days.
My ongoing "project" will be to communicate Weston's beautiful spirit to the world. This project will never end and is the only way I can be his mother now. Right now, my medium for this project is obviously this blog. I will continue blogging as long as Weston continues to inspire and help others through my words and as long as it continues to be therapeutic to me, but this "project" could take a different form in the coming months and years.
I have already seen results of this "project." The candles that many of you lit the other night were so beautiful. So many of you have opened your hearts and lives to me; it is truly an honor that you have let me into these corners of your lives. Sharing my story of loss is therapeutic, as I have said, and I hope your sharing yourselves with me is therapeutic for you.
Sometimes you see or hear something that reminds you of Weston, or sometimes Weston reminds you to not take anything for granted, hug your children tighter, or help someone out. That is the best way to honor Weston and the ultimate gift to me, and it is the reason why my "project" to tell the world about Weston will go on forever.
There is no foot so small that it cannot have an imprint on this world.
~Unknown
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