Well, February is almost over, and I have only now managed to update this blog. A lot has happened since my last post, but anyone who knows me through Facebook already knows our big news: Weston's baby brother is on the way!
The quick stats: I am due July 5. (Weston's birthday is July 7.) I am 21.5 weeks pregnant right now. My baby is the size of a carrot. I had all-day nausea for the first trimester, just like I did with Caroline and Weston. It's mostly gone now. I did not ski in Switzerland (still need to write a post about that trip!). According to the anatomy ultrasound, Baby Brother and my placenta look healthy. He looks like Weston. I am not technically high-risk, but we're going to a maternal-fetal medicine specialist for my ultrasounds. I am "advanced maternal age," which means additional monitoring anyway. Based on my medical history with Weston, I have a higher risk of several serious complications, but a daily baby aspirin cuts those risks in half. Also because of my history with Weston, I will have ultrasounds every four weeks starting at 24 weeks to monitor Baby Brother's growth.
So, given my catastrophic (physician's word) pregnancy with Weston, things are going just about as well as they could with this pregnancy, physically.
My pregnancy with Caroline was blissful in every way. My pregnancy with Weston was a nightmare in every way. Truly. Now that I'm pregnant again, I have realized that I don't have a single positive memory associated with being pregnant with him. I do have one cute picture of Caroline kissing my barely-perceptible 20-week belly, but that's it.
Obviously, then, this pregnancy is more positive, emotionally, than my pregnancy with Weston. Baby Brother is quite active: I've been feeling him move since 14 weeks, which makes me happy. But it's nothing like my pregnancy with Caroline. However, I have another five months to explore this particular issue. More importantly, I have a baby boy growing inside of me who will, hopefully, get to come home and live with our family. We are ecstatic over this fact, and I want my first blog post about it to be positive.
We have actually taken practical steps toward preparing to bring this baby home. At 17 weeks, I bought big workout shorts. As an aside, where the hell are all of the maternity workout clothes? I had to settle for giant-sized non-maternity shorts at Target. I later took them back, because I found two old pair of mine that I stretched out while pregnant with Caroline. But, it was still a big step for me to do something so forward-thinking.
At 19 weeks, we discovered (1) our baby is growing normally; and (2) it's a boy! So I had 4.5 years of girl clothes, blankets, bedding, etc. to sell, and I began sorting through them that night. They are almost gone now.
And, just over the past couple of days, we sold the guest bed and put the not-yet-assembled crib in the now-empty guest room. I even know what kind of nursery decor I want.
I know these are normal pregnancy tasks. For me, though, there is nothing normal about being pregnant after losing a child, so starting to prepare a room for this baby is monumental, and-I'm going to toot my own horn here-I'm pleasantly surprised at my ability to do so. I am actually enjoying the process and am even entertaining the idea of buying paint this upcoming weekend.
There have been highs and lows so far, and they will continue. I'll document some of them here.
Wow. I never ever thought I would have three children. And I never knew I could love three children so much.